Hot Dog Tour 2004

HDT 2004 has officially been over for about a month now and this site will cease to be updated in the forseeable future. Everything will still stay here though so you can relive the wonder that was, and still is, Hot Dog Tour 2004.

We have to thank the fans, without your support and 7000+ hits to our website, we'd never have downed one dog.

While Hot Dog Tour is officially over, the Bone & Bello duo are far from retirement from the eating circuit. What does this mean? Is another tour in the works?

LE TOUR 2005...

Enough BS, here's links to all of the pictures from Hot Dog Tour 2004 and the 1st Annual Tour VS. Spot Dog-Off.

There will probably be more later, plus video, once Dell fixes the servers at HDTHQ.

Pictures from The Bone's Camera
Pictures from Mr. Mirabello's Camera
1st Annual Tour VS. Spot Dog-Off

DUE TO TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES, WE HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO POST ANYTHING THE PAST FEW DAYS.

DON'T WORRY- WE'RE STILL HERE, LARGER AND IN CHARGE- PICTURES AND VIDEO COMING SOON...

TECHINICAL DIFFICULTIES HAVE PREVENTED THE TOUR FROM POSTING ANY PICTURES OR VIDEO FOR THE PAST FEW DAYS. REST ASSURED- THEY ARE STILL COMING.

WE APOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE...

Oklahoma City, OK (AP)- The infamous "Cattlemen's" steak joint in "The OC" gave The Bone "the juiciest" steak he's ever had.

Located in the outskirts of the city, the landmark restaurant claims to have the best beef of the midwest. This bold claim made it only natural for HDT to pay the place a visit and be the final say in its bovine claims. "Some people think all steaks are made equal, but then again, some people like Chicago dogs," said Eskin while waiting to seated.

Once the candidates were ushered into the VIP area, they quickly opened the menu where their eyes were instantly attracted to the one-third of the menu dominated by different steaks. Cattlemen's does offer other dishes besides steak- but getting something like that would be like ordering a cheesesteak without cheese wiz.

"After weighing my options, I decided to go with the strip steak- the perfect balance between size and tenderness," said Bone, "I was tempted by the T-Bone, but the strip seemed to have it all." Despite the jam packed atmosphere, the medium-rare steak arrived in a mere 10 minutes. Sitting in a pool of au jus accompanied by a brick of a baked potato, the perfectly grilled steak glistened with a sheen aiken to the blingiest of bling.

But how did it taste?

The knife slid through the meat like a hot knife through melted butter (yes, melted butter). Upon contact with his tounge, Bone immediately blurted out "I feel so alive right now- I never knew sinking my chompers into another animal could be so good." Simply put, the steak tasted like it should always taste like: steak.

What about Mirabello?

While the other half of HDT only ordered a soup, he has a good explanation. "Our next stop has been kept under wraps as of now- from here we're going through Amarillo, Texas." What's in Amarillo? Three words: The Big Texan. For those of you still in the dark, this highlight of I-40 is home to the "72 oz. Steak Challenge." The challenge puts a willing participant up against a 4.5 pound steak, baked potato, salad, and shrimp cocktail. The stipulation being that if he or she can finish the meal fit for an entire kingdom in under 60 minutes- it's free. If they choke under the pressure (literally or figuratively), they receive a $50 bill.

So is Mirabello going to accept the challenge?

"I hope to, but I really gotta play all this by ear- we're talkin a 72 oz. steak, not some filet mignon," said the candidate.

Eskin though is content with Cattlemen's and does not expect to accept the challenge. "I know my limits," he said, "that accompanied by the fact that I've been 'backed up' the past couple of days led me to my declining of the offer." Eskin confirmed media reports that since the early hours of dawn he has been chugging magnesium citrate and inhaling metamucil wafers like it's nobody's business.

The two will arrive at The Big Texan in 2 hours from leaving The OC.




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Kansas City, MO (AP)- After making the 8 hour trek south, Bone and Mirabello were shocked,awed, sauced, and spiced by Arthur Bryant's BBQ- perhaps some of the best food this country has to offer.

The sleepy midwest town was abruptly awakened later yesterday afternoon by HDT plowing through to the infamous BBQ mecca: Arthur Bryant's. The menu, as well as the appearance from outside, was modest compared to the treasure trove of food held within. The Bone's first round consisted of a mammoth beef sandwhich with fries while Mirabello decided to go with a pork sandwhich and fries.

"It almost isn't fair to call these things sandwhiches- that's like calling the Grand Canyon a hole in the ground," said Mirabello. And he's not exaggerating- the amount of meat rendered two soggy pieces of Wonder Bread useless.

Not wasring any time, the candidates found a table and begun to squirt the two signature Bryant BBQ sauces over their troughs of smoked and grilled delicacies. "My partner was a little more reserved with the sauce than I was," said Bone. "But me? I poured that liquid gold over every inch of my plate."

How was it?

Let's just say this, the candidates were looking through apartment brochures before they had even swallowed their first bites. "This is probably some of the best food I have ever put in my mouth," Mirabello said. Within minutes of diving in, sauce was all over the faces of the two men.

Bone commented on the messy eating style between bites, "Where are we Le Bec Fin? No, we're eatin outstanding barbecue- we're sloppin it all over like it's nobody's business." He described the "original" sauce as spicy- but sweet enough to be guzzled by the weak of stomach. "You know what really grabbed me by the sauce? I tasted Old Bay in there- who doesn't love Old Bay Seasoning?" The "sweet" sauce left any spicy-ness to the side of the road and focused all of its efforts on being sweet and tangy. "It was a smooth flavor," said Bone, "it really mellowed the meal- but my true allegiance goes to the original."

After polishing off their sandwhiches and chatting it up with some of the locals (and therefore Bryant regulars), they slipped back in the growing line at the counter. Round two consisted of an order of short end ribs and a burnt ends sandwhich (the crispy ends cut off of the brisket). "We'd be lying if we said we weren't a little full at that point, but want to try all this place has to offer," said Mirabello.

So what was the second round like?

While the candidates thoroughly enjoyed their plates- nothing compares to your very first bite of Arthur Bryant's. The ribs were good though, both agreed they loved the smokey flavor- strong enough to let you know it was there, but subtle enough not to overpower the myriad of other flavors. The burnt ends sandwhich, while still delicious, simply did not pack enough flavor to induce orgasm like the other dishes.

Sitting at the table after the meal, the candidates were stuffed beyond any recognition of their former stomachs. In usual fashion, the duo split the scene of the crime and made the 5 hour drive through endless cornfields to Oklahoma City.

Will they ever be back to Bryant's?

This is still unclear at press time. However, before setting off into the sunset, the two were asked if they'd ever be seen in Kansas City again to which they replied: "You never know- only time and a craving for the world's best barbecue will tell."

ORIGINAL PUBLICATION: 8/11, 1:00PM

ORIGINAL O'S DOGS BITE BACK

Cleveland, OHIO (AP) – With just over 400 miles until Chicago, Bone and Mirabello left Pittsburgh with dogs under their belts and smiles on their faces.

Rolling into the nutmeg state with empty stomachs, Hot Dog Tour wasted no time in making their way to "The Original Hot Dog Shop" located next to the University of Pittsburgh campus. After a much needed urine break, the candidates mulled over the options presented to them on the establishment’s wall mounted menu.

"30 seconds into searching the menu, the two candidates spotted a dog that was calling their name aptly named ‘SuperDog.’ The dog was dressed in american cheese and bacon," said a campaign spokesman.

However, while the two men of mystery have had experience with dogs- their medium order of fries seemed more like a party size platter of the crispy taters. When asked for comment, Mirabello said "We needed a separate tray just for the fries. With the dog and the cannon of diet coke, the fries made our lunchtime snack and feast fit for a king and queen."

"This dog’s got twang, yeah, twang," said Bone after sinking his teeth into the infamous first bite. Analysts are not sure, however, if either Bone or Mirabello adequately tasted the dogs because within seconds they were gone. "We order, we eat, then we roll- we’re not here to make friends- if I’m gonna be sellin low, I gotta be buyin high," responded Bone to the criticism.

Heading back onto the Pennsylvania Turnpike, an unexpected medical emergency hit one of the candidates. All that is known at press time is that the emergency somehow involved a lot of dry fruit eaten early in the morning, greasy fries at lunch, and a weak stomach. "The candidates are in excellent health and are currently slipping and sliding through Ohio on I-80," said campaign spokesman.

Chicaigo, ILLINOIS (AP)- While rain, sleet, or snow can't stop HDT, technical difficulties can.

Official word from the Tour's camp promises that the candidates have had no problems with transportation, but there have been mishaps in the process of updating the official website.

"We have some really great pictures we'd love to show everyone. The pizza in Chicago is something that should not, under any circumstances, be missed. The dogs though, well, that's a whole other story," said Bone.

The hot dog hopefuls arrived in the "beehive state" around 6:30 CST and wasted no time on locating "Lou Malnati's." A medium deep dish pizza was already waiting in the oven for them. "I liked the sports decor in there, a real homerun (pun intended)" said Mirabello.

What about the pizza?

"Do I even need to say it? Outstanding. The deep dish, tender, chewey crust was buttery and flakey- dog, this is the real deal," Bone said. The dude didn't stop there either. He went on in detail about the sauce and cheese: "The layering on the pizza went fresh mozzarella cheese, sweet and chunky sauce, and to top it off, a light dusting of grated parmesan- I'm salivating just thinking about it... we may have to stop the tour 2200 miles short and set up shop right here in Chicago, sin city."

But this isn't called Hot Dog for nothing, so how were Chicago's dogs?

Mirabello jumped at the opportunity to give his opinion of the franks obtained at "Portillo's"- a Chicago hotspot for dogs, pasta, ribs, and other trash. "They tasted like something I'd get from McDonalds... on a bad day. I don't care how they dress them (which was with onions, a tomato, pickles, and peppers on a poppy seed bun)- the dog was terrible."

Was it really that bad?

"Yeah, we just said they sucked," said The Bone. "I hope we accidentally got rotten dogs because I know motown can do better."

Harsh words and hurt feelings brought the night to a close as the two men packed it in and hit the hay.

Right now, the tour bus is rocking through Illinois on I-88 to Des Moines where they'll turn their sights southward to the next major stop: Arthur Bryant's BBQ in Kansas City.

Pictures coming soon...

Somewhere on the Ohio Turnpike (MSNBC)- It's official, "The Original O's" in Pittsburgh was a UGE success.

The two HDT'ers are extremely pleased with their Western Pennsylvania performance.

Full story and pictures will follow shortly.

Hot Dog Tour is currently plowing through the 'land of milk and honey': Ohio. Story developing...